before and after

Yes, our little Augie's not so little anymore. Born 6 lbs 8 oz, now 9 lbs 8 oz. That's 50% of his body weight in one month! Needless to say, breastfeeding is going very well.

everything is new

Hah. These look like Augie's first feature interview photo shoot. Just hanging out on his nursing pillow, pontificating.

August is already one month old! The last month has been a surreal and happy blur of learning and serious sleep deprivation. It's been so cool to see him discover the world and change every day. We knew the first weeks would be trying and true enough, there have been some really hard days as we figured things out on a few hours sleep but most days have been the most epic, heart-bursting awesomeness of our lives.

Stuff Augie's into:

Chuckling in his sleep

Furrowing his brow

Making billy goat noises

Sighing sweetly

Smiling (first one at 10 days old)

Being naked

Looking out at the trees

Bath time

Eating! (duh)

just the three of us

Our tired, happy family

cozy times with dad

Yep, it's true. Augie's gonna love his dad's former hometown.

Grandma and Grandpa Hall just arrived from New Hampshire and we're all very happy to see them!

poetics

Augie's talented young friend Ivy wrote him a sweet little poem:

For thousands of years,

people have loved

the world whether

they were pushed or shoved.

Some say it's smooth,

and some say it's mean,

but to tell you the truth,

it's wonderful, I've seen.

Welcome to the earth, August!

We love it and the clever girl who wrote it.

Mom and me giving August his first bath

Welcome to the world, sweet baby August

still growing, healthy and strong

Love set you going like a fat gold watch.
The midwife slapped your footsoles, and your bald cry
Took its place among the elements.
-Sylvia Plath

The Long Noodle, as the doctor has taken to calling him, is due in one day. We wait with bated breath...

Happy Father's Day!

...to both our dads and this amazing dad-to-be above. I love you with all my heart and so will our little man.

In other news, I have ankles again. No more Fred Flintsone feet! For now.

Comes a time

Maybe it's especially noticeable right now, days before our son makes his way into the world, but I think pregnancy brings out a fine-tuned bullshit detector and way less patience for that bullshit once you come across it. You read the news and get even more pissed off at all the nastiness, more outraged by thoughtless behavior, more aware of who your real friends are because the rest sort of fall away somehow. Next to this acute impatience, though, is overwhelming gratitude for the simplest kindnesses. Everything comes into focus. 

...and yes, I'm totally high on hormones. 

Photo by Lennart Nilson

Listening to old Built to Spill today and when their song Cleo came on, I stopped mid-thought to listen closely and realized for the first time what the song's about. 

Wiggly days wiggly nights
When it's dark bring in lights so you can see
What a sound straight through my spine
Bounced off me
Makes me round
3-D sound
Push it down move it around,
see I'm fine

Ain't it strange that I can dream
(You can say it's night or day
Snow or rain it's all the same)
When there's nothing I have ever seen
(In here, In here)
Ain't it strange that I can dream
(You can say it's night or day
Snow or rain it's all the same)
Ain't it strange that I have brain activity
(In here, In here)

Who brought those cameras in
Who gave who the right
Inside a sea turned from frog to freak
(Lennart Nilson shut off those lights)
to tiny, red, and meek
Ain't it strange that I can dream
(You can say it's night or day
Snow or rain it's all the same)
Ain't it strange that I'm a human being
Ain't it strange that I can dream
(You can say it's night or day
Snow or rain it's all the same)

Living in the womb
Running out of room
Have to come out soon
Have to meet the sun and moon...

17 days and counting

The last few weeks of pregnancy make damn sure that you're in so much discomfort that you're ready & willing to go into hours of hard labor at the drop of a hat. Eager, in fact. Fakey fake Braxton-Hicks contractions are the biggest teases in the world (yesss...nope...yes...no), you get 3 or 4 hours of sleep a night, your hips ache, you pee every hour, your feet are swollen and sore, walking is exhausting, getting out of bed hurts, and you feel sort of permanently dazed. Happily, though. 

nest fest

Hey lil Junebug, you're officially FULL TERM on Saturday so feel free to join us any time after that. We don't want to rush you, though, so if you feel like hanging out in there a few weeks longer, that's cool. I have a feeling you're gonna take your time, mellow dude. 

In the meantime, we've been prepping like crazy for your debut. I'd heard about the nesting instinct but didn't fully understand its overwhelming power until last week. I organized our linen closet, colour-coordinated and hand-rolled the towels, and for the first and probably last time, ironed pillow cases and a few duvet covers. Next was the bedroom closet, where I cleaned out tons of old clothes and donated them to charity. Your daddy's been watering, weeding and planting new fleurs and veg in the garden for you to admire, and he also hung new blinds and curtains in your room. 

I wonder what insane cleaning frenzy will hit me next...

Uh

Never ever ever ever ever

I'm not really as crabby as I look here...

I guess my discomfort is starting to show. My massage appointment later today is going to save me. Chris has been so awesome the whole pregnancy but last night he went beyond the call of duty when he offered to clip my toenails because I can no longer reach. I almost got him to shave my legs as well, but I figured out a way to contort my body to do it on my own. 

Next time I'll post about the insane nesting instinct that's kicked in.  Ironing pillow cases? Yup. 

This must be the "holy crap, we're having a baby in a month or less" stage

Chris and his mom

We've already had nine months of planning, hoping, wishing, prepping, and talking, but only now does it feel like we're truly at the edge of one of the biggest life changes we'll ever experience. It's happiness, excitement, nervousness and surrealism all at once. We can't wait, yet we're trying to savor these last 4 weeks of relative calm. 

Side note to people who want to tell me their horror birth stories: save it 'til after baby's born, mkay? Thankssss.

36 days to go!

Given Chris' and my proclivities, I think Bumper will probably be really into books. I'm starting to collect some faves here and there, but not sure about the really good ones for when he's still a baby. Recommendations welcome!

Countdown is so on. Hospital bag basically ready to go. Chris and I have been reading tons about newborn care, the stages of labor, what to do when we get to the hospital, etc. Sunny walks every day and getting sleep whenever I can. I'm up for 2, 3, sometimes 4 hours every night so most days I'm just epically tired. Totally weird feeling like you're walking (make that waddling) around in a drugged haze some days. 

Strawberries, nuts, fish, yogurt, veggies. I'm making sure to get a good mix of healthy foods each day for baby's growing body and brain. It's been a little tougher lately because my appetite's really diminished. I had to force myself to eat dinner last night. Less room in there now?

Baby's movement these days feels like he's about to bust on out. I swear he's doing trapeze tricks from my rib cage. That achy, waddly, huge, slightly impatient stage everyone warned me about? So there.

42 days or less til we meet you, sweet baby!

baby's room is coming together!

We picked up the crib this weekend--thanks so much Gramma-2-be and Opa-de Sud! Chris spent hours putting it together in the living room before we realized it wouldn't fit down the hall and we had to disassemble it and reassemble it in the nursery. Doh. The blue geometric blanket was a gift from my friend and colleague, Amanda, and I love it. You can find more of her beautiful handiwork at owlandpussycat.etsy.com I got the print of Chris' hands printed on stretched canvas and it was quick, easy and it's super lightweight. 

We went to our first prenatal class last night and it was great. 90% of the class are home birthers. I felt a little like Amy Poehler in Baby Mama but I'm cool with that. 

Whoa, baby

The month before sweet baby arrives is turning out to be a little more dramatic than we'd anticipated. Chris got into a bad car accident the other day when a truck ran a red light and plowed into him. He's very sore but mostly ok. The worst part was how scary it was for both of us. Makes you even more grateful for good love, good friends, good family and just...life.  Here's to a much mellower rest of May.

miracle-gro

It's kinda hard to believe I'm going to get even bigger than this but Bumper still has a lotta growing to do over the next 56 days. Right now he's about 4 lbs and 17 inches long in there and he's supposed to gain about half a pound per week from here on out. Grow, little muffin, grow. 

gnarly horse

Cloud mobile in baby's room. 

I scared the crap out of Chris last night when I bolted upright in bed at 4am, crying in pain with the worst full leg charlie horse ever. He grabbed my belly thinking it something much more serious. It was excruciating and I'm limping a little today as a result. Note to self: eat more bananas. 

Today's my last day working in the office! Excited but super busy...

free to be you and me, brahs

My dad and a friend, late 40's

Since we've learned that baby is (most likely) a boy, I've been surprised by some casual, lukewarm summations of raising babies of the male persuasion. Mostly tired cliches about girls being all sweetness, goodness and light while boys are trucks, destruction and kinda mean. It's pretty sexist and I'm bummed that it's come from women who appear to have great men in their lives. Girls rule, boys drool. Boys suck. I know that it's partly a tongue-in-cheek response to sexism women have dealt with, but since when does countering intolerance with intolerance seem like a good idea? The upside of all this is that I've been thinking a lot about how we can raise a child who has pride, love and confidence in themselves and others, regardless of gender.


I think Harry and Marlo said it best. Play us out, guys...

10 weeks (or less) to go!

Top image is Chris reading to my cousin's sweet little guy, Jesse.

In the homestretch now. We've been getting things done every weekend like nursery painting, car seat, cloth diaper service research, but there's still a lot to do. The late night pre-baby jitters have cropped up here and there, but it's all part of the journey, right? 

Start working from home at the end of the month, which will help with the really bad back pain from sitting and typing in a chair for over 8 hours every day. Definitely in the uncomfortable stage now---turning over in bed feels like an epic endeavor. Feeling healthy and strong, though. 

Dr. Rosengarten says Bumper is doing great and predicts an easy labor and delivery. He said a similar patient (same body type and easy pregnancy) delivered in 20 minutes! (Don't worry--I'm not going to count on that). We can't wait for prenatal classes to start so we're a little more prepped for little man's arrival. 

boy oh boys

My friend Nugget brought over her CUTE x 2 twin boys, William and Gabriel, for a photo shoot yesterday and these are a few of the outtakes. 

I realized that photographing babies is tricky, but photographing twins is twice as tricky. It was so much fun, though. 

cozy times indeed

We got a package in the mail recently from my Aunt Mary Lou, with three gorgeous, cozy and soft baby blankets that she lovingly knit. We love them and baby will too! Thanks so much, Auntie M.L.

In other news, baby has a name now but we're keeping it a surprise!

heading into month 7

Spent about an hour raking & weeding in the yard yesterday and my body is officially on strike today. Ow. 

Favourite new thing: feeling baby hiccupping. *cute*

Some weeks are harder...

...but that's a given. Week 26 has brought sciatica, one swollen leg, more fitful sleeps, an extra busy work load, and just feeling out of sorts. Things have gone so beautifully so far that I'm due for some of this. Heading into the third trimester. I've heard there'll be a little more of this. I'm ready.
We love you, baby xox

mini versions

Mom gave me some baby albums this past weekend to make some scans. The first pic is my mom and me; the second my cousin Jessica, my sister Megan, my mom and me.

I think junior will definitely be blonde to begin with but not sure if he'll get the mad scientist hair gene that I have. We'll see...

I like this series of photographs by Ryan Marshall. He takes photos of his pregnant wife's belly each week with little messages to their unborn baby. See more here

25 weeks

Prepping, reading, learning, planning as the weeks pass. Just 15 more to go! We've been getting little things together like booking prenatal classes (at the awesome Pomegranate: http://www.pomegranate-midwives.com), deciding on cloth diapers, prepping for my one-year mat leave, Baby Bjorn vs BabyHawk carriers, trying to figure out if those 'little necessities' are really necessities. We've also been thinking about bigger picture stuff like what kind of parents we want to be and realizing how much we have to learn.

Talking to Junior each night as he rolls and kicks and dances. You can literally see him somersault around in there. Chris read "Where the Wild Things Are" to him the other night. 

We're just so excited to meet him in a few months.

vintage pregs

heh

whoa belly

it just keeps growing

almost 6 months

Thanks to Chris' mom and dad, I have an awesome supply of mini-Chris pictures. Steve took this shot in the lovely New Hampshire woods, some time in the early 70's.

Just over 22 weeks. Heartburn and hip aches these days, but really can't complain. I feel incredibly lucky to feel healthy and strong and to know baby's doing great.

we've taken to calling him junior

guess who?

Ummm, how much do I love this picture and my husband? So very much.