still growing, healthy and strong

Love set you going like a fat gold watch.
The midwife slapped your footsoles, and your bald cry
Took its place among the elements.
-Sylvia Plath

The Long Noodle, as the doctor has taken to calling him, is due in one day. We wait with bated breath...

Happy Father's Day!

...to both our dads and this amazing dad-to-be above. I love you with all my heart and so will our little man.

In other news, I have ankles again. No more Fred Flintsone feet! For now.

Comes a time

Maybe it's especially noticeable right now, days before our son makes his way into the world, but I think pregnancy brings out a fine-tuned bullshit detector and way less patience for that bullshit once you come across it. You read the news and get even more pissed off at all the nastiness, more outraged by thoughtless behavior, more aware of who your real friends are because the rest sort of fall away somehow. Next to this acute impatience, though, is overwhelming gratitude for the simplest kindnesses. Everything comes into focus. 

...and yes, I'm totally high on hormones. 

Photo by Lennart Nilson

Listening to old Built to Spill today and when their song Cleo came on, I stopped mid-thought to listen closely and realized for the first time what the song's about. 

Wiggly days wiggly nights
When it's dark bring in lights so you can see
What a sound straight through my spine
Bounced off me
Makes me round
3-D sound
Push it down move it around,
see I'm fine

Ain't it strange that I can dream
(You can say it's night or day
Snow or rain it's all the same)
When there's nothing I have ever seen
(In here, In here)
Ain't it strange that I can dream
(You can say it's night or day
Snow or rain it's all the same)
Ain't it strange that I have brain activity
(In here, In here)

Who brought those cameras in
Who gave who the right
Inside a sea turned from frog to freak
(Lennart Nilson shut off those lights)
to tiny, red, and meek
Ain't it strange that I can dream
(You can say it's night or day
Snow or rain it's all the same)
Ain't it strange that I'm a human being
Ain't it strange that I can dream
(You can say it's night or day
Snow or rain it's all the same)

Living in the womb
Running out of room
Have to come out soon
Have to meet the sun and moon...

17 days and counting

The last few weeks of pregnancy make damn sure that you're in so much discomfort that you're ready & willing to go into hours of hard labor at the drop of a hat. Eager, in fact. Fakey fake Braxton-Hicks contractions are the biggest teases in the world (yesss...nope...yes...no), you get 3 or 4 hours of sleep a night, your hips ache, you pee every hour, your feet are swollen and sore, walking is exhausting, getting out of bed hurts, and you feel sort of permanently dazed. Happily, though. 

nest fest

Hey lil Junebug, you're officially FULL TERM on Saturday so feel free to join us any time after that. We don't want to rush you, though, so if you feel like hanging out in there a few weeks longer, that's cool. I have a feeling you're gonna take your time, mellow dude. 

In the meantime, we've been prepping like crazy for your debut. I'd heard about the nesting instinct but didn't fully understand its overwhelming power until last week. I organized our linen closet, colour-coordinated and hand-rolled the towels, and for the first and probably last time, ironed pillow cases and a few duvet covers. Next was the bedroom closet, where I cleaned out tons of old clothes and donated them to charity. Your daddy's been watering, weeding and planting new fleurs and veg in the garden for you to admire, and he also hung new blinds and curtains in your room. 

I wonder what insane cleaning frenzy will hit me next...

Uh

Never ever ever ever ever

I'm not really as crabby as I look here...

I guess my discomfort is starting to show. My massage appointment later today is going to save me. Chris has been so awesome the whole pregnancy but last night he went beyond the call of duty when he offered to clip my toenails because I can no longer reach. I almost got him to shave my legs as well, but I figured out a way to contort my body to do it on my own. 

Next time I'll post about the insane nesting instinct that's kicked in.  Ironing pillow cases? Yup. 

This must be the "holy crap, we're having a baby in a month or less" stage

Chris and his mom

We've already had nine months of planning, hoping, wishing, prepping, and talking, but only now does it feel like we're truly at the edge of one of the biggest life changes we'll ever experience. It's happiness, excitement, nervousness and surrealism all at once. We can't wait, yet we're trying to savor these last 4 weeks of relative calm. 

Side note to people who want to tell me their horror birth stories: save it 'til after baby's born, mkay? Thankssss.

36 days to go!

Given Chris' and my proclivities, I think Bumper will probably be really into books. I'm starting to collect some faves here and there, but not sure about the really good ones for when he's still a baby. Recommendations welcome!

Countdown is so on. Hospital bag basically ready to go. Chris and I have been reading tons about newborn care, the stages of labor, what to do when we get to the hospital, etc. Sunny walks every day and getting sleep whenever I can. I'm up for 2, 3, sometimes 4 hours every night so most days I'm just epically tired. Totally weird feeling like you're walking (make that waddling) around in a drugged haze some days. 

Strawberries, nuts, fish, yogurt, veggies. I'm making sure to get a good mix of healthy foods each day for baby's growing body and brain. It's been a little tougher lately because my appetite's really diminished. I had to force myself to eat dinner last night. Less room in there now?

Baby's movement these days feels like he's about to bust on out. I swear he's doing trapeze tricks from my rib cage. That achy, waddly, huge, slightly impatient stage everyone warned me about? So there.

42 days or less til we meet you, sweet baby!

baby's room is coming together!

We picked up the crib this weekend--thanks so much Gramma-2-be and Opa-de Sud! Chris spent hours putting it together in the living room before we realized it wouldn't fit down the hall and we had to disassemble it and reassemble it in the nursery. Doh. The blue geometric blanket was a gift from my friend and colleague, Amanda, and I love it. You can find more of her beautiful handiwork at owlandpussycat.etsy.com I got the print of Chris' hands printed on stretched canvas and it was quick, easy and it's super lightweight. 

We went to our first prenatal class last night and it was great. 90% of the class are home birthers. I felt a little like Amy Poehler in Baby Mama but I'm cool with that. 

Whoa, baby

The month before sweet baby arrives is turning out to be a little more dramatic than we'd anticipated. Chris got into a bad car accident the other day when a truck ran a red light and plowed into him. He's very sore but mostly ok. The worst part was how scary it was for both of us. Makes you even more grateful for good love, good friends, good family and just...life.  Here's to a much mellower rest of May.

miracle-gro

It's kinda hard to believe I'm going to get even bigger than this but Bumper still has a lotta growing to do over the next 56 days. Right now he's about 4 lbs and 17 inches long in there and he's supposed to gain about half a pound per week from here on out. Grow, little muffin, grow. 

gnarly horse

Cloud mobile in baby's room. 

I scared the crap out of Chris last night when I bolted upright in bed at 4am, crying in pain with the worst full leg charlie horse ever. He grabbed my belly thinking it something much more serious. It was excruciating and I'm limping a little today as a result. Note to self: eat more bananas. 

Today's my last day working in the office! Excited but super busy...

free to be you and me, brahs

My dad and a friend, late 40's

Since we've learned that baby is (most likely) a boy, I've been surprised by some casual, lukewarm summations of raising babies of the male persuasion. Mostly tired cliches about girls being all sweetness, goodness and light while boys are trucks, destruction and kinda mean. It's pretty sexist and I'm bummed that it's come from women who appear to have great men in their lives. Girls rule, boys drool. Boys suck. I know that it's partly a tongue-in-cheek response to sexism women have dealt with, but since when does countering intolerance with intolerance seem like a good idea? The upside of all this is that I've been thinking a lot about how we can raise a child who has pride, love and confidence in themselves and others, regardless of gender.


I think Harry and Marlo said it best. Play us out, guys...

10 weeks (or less) to go!

Top image is Chris reading to my cousin's sweet little guy, Jesse.

In the homestretch now. We've been getting things done every weekend like nursery painting, car seat, cloth diaper service research, but there's still a lot to do. The late night pre-baby jitters have cropped up here and there, but it's all part of the journey, right? 

Start working from home at the end of the month, which will help with the really bad back pain from sitting and typing in a chair for over 8 hours every day. Definitely in the uncomfortable stage now---turning over in bed feels like an epic endeavor. Feeling healthy and strong, though. 

Dr. Rosengarten says Bumper is doing great and predicts an easy labor and delivery. He said a similar patient (same body type and easy pregnancy) delivered in 20 minutes! (Don't worry--I'm not going to count on that). We can't wait for prenatal classes to start so we're a little more prepped for little man's arrival. 

boy oh boys

My friend Nugget brought over her CUTE x 2 twin boys, William and Gabriel, for a photo shoot yesterday and these are a few of the outtakes. 

I realized that photographing babies is tricky, but photographing twins is twice as tricky. It was so much fun, though. 

cozy times indeed

We got a package in the mail recently from my Aunt Mary Lou, with three gorgeous, cozy and soft baby blankets that she lovingly knit. We love them and baby will too! Thanks so much, Auntie M.L.

In other news, baby has a name now but we're keeping it a surprise!

heading into month 7

Spent about an hour raking & weeding in the yard yesterday and my body is officially on strike today. Ow. 

Favourite new thing: feeling baby hiccupping. *cute*

Some weeks are harder...

...but that's a given. Week 26 has brought sciatica, one swollen leg, more fitful sleeps, an extra busy work load, and just feeling out of sorts. Things have gone so beautifully so far that I'm due for some of this. Heading into the third trimester. I've heard there'll be a little more of this. I'm ready.
We love you, baby xox

mini versions

Mom gave me some baby albums this past weekend to make some scans. The first pic is my mom and me; the second my cousin Jessica, my sister Megan, my mom and me.

I think junior will definitely be blonde to begin with but not sure if he'll get the mad scientist hair gene that I have. We'll see...

I like this series of photographs by Ryan Marshall. He takes photos of his pregnant wife's belly each week with little messages to their unborn baby. See more here

25 weeks

Prepping, reading, learning, planning as the weeks pass. Just 15 more to go! We've been getting little things together like booking prenatal classes (at the awesome Pomegranate: http://www.pomegranate-midwives.com), deciding on cloth diapers, prepping for my one-year mat leave, Baby Bjorn vs BabyHawk carriers, trying to figure out if those 'little necessities' are really necessities. We've also been thinking about bigger picture stuff like what kind of parents we want to be and realizing how much we have to learn.

Talking to Junior each night as he rolls and kicks and dances. You can literally see him somersault around in there. Chris read "Where the Wild Things Are" to him the other night. 

We're just so excited to meet him in a few months.

vintage pregs

heh

whoa belly

it just keeps growing

almost 6 months

Thanks to Chris' mom and dad, I have an awesome supply of mini-Chris pictures. Steve took this shot in the lovely New Hampshire woods, some time in the early 70's.

Just over 22 weeks. Heartburn and hip aches these days, but really can't complain. I feel incredibly lucky to feel healthy and strong and to know baby's doing great.

we've taken to calling him junior

guess who?

Ummm, how much do I love this picture and my husband? So very much.

totally a bout de souffle over here

Weird pregnancy symptom of the moment: breathlessness. When I'm walking, talking, laying down, lifting anything. It's totally normal and due to hormones swelling the respiratory tract. Later on, it's from the baby pushing up into the diaphragm toward the lungs. Not a big deal, but suddenly taking a walk in the hood and getting groceries feels like a much more monumental task than normal.

Baby's kicking and somersaulting like crazy every day and it's pretty awesome. Chris got to feel a kick from the outside last week, too. Counting down the minutes to our OB apppointment on Thursday, when we'll get the detailed ultrasound results.

half baked

So now that I'm in the 20th week, we're half way there! Yesterday was our big ultrasound and baby's looking great, as you can see above. The first shot is the profile, second is the spine and head, and the last is my favourite--baby skeletor face. So cool to see him/her, hands and tiny feet moving, little heart thumping!

The u/s technician had to shake, poke and prod (ow) to get baby to change position for a better view of the heart. After a particularly vigorous shake, baby finally cooperated. We'll find out the details on how baby looks at our appointment next week with Dr. Rosengarten. Full report will include baby's sex. Exciiiiited.

babies know

My friend Cookie sent me this and it's funny 'cause it's true

more than a feeling

The big news this week is that I'm definitely feeling the baby move! Tiny little fluttery taps and bubbles. The first time it happened, it made me stop, laugh and immediately tell Chris that baby was tap-tapping on my belly. Couldn't stop smiling. Today at work as I sat at my desk writing, I could feel tons of activity in there. Amazing.

My belly's gone through a speedy growth spurt in the last week, so I'm showing a little more obviously. Big ultrasound in two weeks, when we hope to find out if our little bean is a girl or a boy. We're not excited at all. Nah.

no sleep 'til 2013

Awake every night for at least two hours for the last month. I fall asleep right away then up at 2 or 3, completely alert and unable to get comfy. Good practice for the hardcore sleeplessness to come, but I was hoping I could fit in some high-quality sleep now before it's all a distant memory. And so the hazing begins...

I've got company, apparently. My dad couldn't sleep the other night and sent us this cute poem he wrote while he was up:

BUMP
Brought on by international cooperation
Under the influence of Greek stimulation
Manufactured by North American innovation
Parlayed into June's sensation

Thanks Dad! We love you and the new gonk will, too xo

and perhaps most crucial of all...

music appreciation

I read an article this week about baby's senses in utero, and as early as 18 weeks they can hear voices and music. So we want to start a playlist for baby and let him/her have a little listen every once in a while in utero. Willie, The Beach Boys, Blossom Dearie, Chopin, Les McCann, Jose Feliciano. Hmm. I wonder if they make lullaby versions of Motorhead? 

picturing you

Chris and his beautiful mama, Barbara, in Germany. Wonder if our little one will be blonde-haired & blue-eyed too?

a boy named sue

Ok, so we don't know whether baby's a boy or girl and we definitely won't be naming him or her Sue, but we're starting to think about what's in a name. We have a few favourites in mind, but it's easy to feel overwhelmed by all the possibilities, subtle nuances and potential for horrifying nicknames. I can easily see myself falling into the Nymbler vortex a little farther down the line.

belly watch '09

15 weeks and feeling fine. Starting to show just a little and yet my jeans are nowhere close to fitting any more. Stretchy dresses, leggings and tights 24/7.

Appointment with Dr. Rosengarten in a few days for the triple screen blood test--it measures AFP, hCG and estriol levels in order to assess the probability of genetic disorders like Downs Syndrome and neural tube defects like Spina bifida. False postives are common, apparently, so I have mixed feelings about it. Hopefully there'll be nothing to fret about.